“a witty and compassionate guide to the myths and science of twinship...”
—Honor Moore, author of The Bishop’s Daughter
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Category: Reviews & Praise
"It was exactly the kind of resource I needed...."
-reanbean.com
One and the Same tells the story of Abigail’s life with identical twin sister, Robin, and how their twinship changed as they grew older. But it’s not just a story about the Pogrebin twins. Stories from many sets of identical twins and other experts (doctors, researchers, authors- some of them twins themselves) are woven in throughout each chapter, allowing the reader a most complete depiction of what twins experience throughout their lives. From these stories, I learned how amazingly safe and secure one can feel with a twin by his/her side, as well as how difficult it can be to constantly feel the need to match and represent the one who shares your same image. But what blew me away were the stories that shared such honest emotions regarding how it felt when the twins separated and began to individuate on their own.
While the story is focused on twinship between identicals, I couldn’t help but notice similarities between the personal stories shared and the interactions I observe daily between my twins…I can see how they cherish their special relationship, but also how they are beginning to individuate already. And while I’ve been able to see for a while that it is difficult for one when the other wants some time away from her, I can now begin to understand why it is difficult for her and what she might be feeling.
[One and the Same] was exactly the kind of resource I needed to begin to understand how my twins may see themselves, as well as what I can do as a parent to help them develop as individuals.
(Author note: I’m grateful to reanbean.com for such a kind review and I recommend her blog enormously for all fellow parents-of-multiples.)
"Must-read for all Mothers of Multiples "
-Ashley
Link: Saylucky
In Abigail’s book, she shares her experiences growing up as a twin and learning how to be an individual. I think One and the Same is a must-read for all MoMs. Abigail’s insight on the relationship between twins is valuable for parents who are in the midst of raising twins. I have not finished the book yet (I’m working on it, you know the whole full-time job two babies thing), but I have enjoyed what I have read and can barely put it down. I hope my girls can have the close relationship that Abigail and Robin have. I have also taken to heart her advice on spending separate time with each child….
Make sure you check out saylucky.blogspot.com!
"I could not put the book down"
-Amanda Dittlinger
I recently read the book One and the Same: My Life as an Identical Twin and What I’ve Learned About Everyone’s Struggle to Be Singular by Abigail Pogrebin. I always have my eye out for books that will help me understand what is like to be a part of a pair and so when I saw this book advertised in a Twin Club newsletter, I downloaded it to my Kindle on a whim. I’m glad I didn’t have much going on that week because I could not put the book down. It made me laugh, it made me cry, it made me feel like I was getting to know the future Maddie and Izzie better. Throughout the book Abigail is interviewing other twins in a search to learn more about herself and her relationship with her identical sister. The stories will both warm you and sometimes make you sad. I learned so much from reading her book. For example, not to idealize and romanticize the twinship of my girls. It is a special, unique bond, but it isn’t always perfect and it shouldn’t be. I highly recommend this book to all parents of multiples, or actually anyone who is in any kind of relationship with a multiple.
(From Abby: Thank you to Amanda—please check out her great blog: www.txtwins.blogspot.com)
17th
Generous review from Tater Twins
"I expected to enjoy it...but I found it hard to put down."
-Jayme on Tatertwins.com
This past week while in Philly I read a book called One and the Same: My Life As an Identical Twin and What I’ve Learned about Everyone’s Struggle to be Singular by Abigail Pogrebin. The subject matter intrigued me as a new parent to twin boys, even though mine are not identical. I wasn’t sure what kind of read it would be- whether it would be full of stats and numbers and quotes from studies or would it be an easy read, with a story line. While I was interested in the subject matter, I didn’t know if it was something that a person who was not a twin or a parent of twins would find engaging.
What I found was a book full of fascinating actual stories from countless twins that Abigail Pogrebin interviewed. I read her recaps of interviews with fertility specialists, psychologists, and other experts- where they discussed their studies of twins, theories, and more. She managed to thread her own story of being an identical twin among all of the information she shares flawlessly. While I did not undergo fertility treatments to conceive my twins, I found that section very informative. As a mother who has had babies die, I also found her coverage of the loss of one twin excellent.
This book surprised me in that it was such a riveting read. I expected to enjoy it, as I have always been enthralled by twins, but I found it hard to put down. I was gripped by the stories of the twins- such as the twin men who each lost a child and the set in which one had gender reassignment surgery. I thought the details on the studies of genetics and other research very interesting, especially since one of my twins has cancer and the other does not.
In addition to the book One and the Same, Abigail Pogrebin also maintains a website in which she uses her expertise to answer questions on twins. On the same site, you can find her blog and other writing. For me, as an only child, learning about sibling relationships- especially twinship- is crucial for me to be the best parent I can to my children. Reading her writing has given me great insight to how twins feel.
I would recommend this book not solely to anyone who is a twin or has twins, but additionally anyone curious about the amazing phenomenon of two people sharing the same DNA. You won’t just learn a considerable amount of information about twins, but you will also enjoy the heartfelt stories. Abigail Pogrebin shares not only her life, but the captivating lives of so many other sets of twins in One and the Same.
Read more: http://www.tatertwins.com/2010/02/one-and-same.html#ixzz0fnX6r03r
20th
Kind review from Twice the Love
"I cannot say enough good things about this book."
-Amanda Nethero
Link: twicethelovereviews.blogspot.com
Even though my twins are fraternal I was still excited to read Abigail Pogrebin’s book, One and the Same. Abby is a Yale graduate, author, television producer and most importantly, an identical twin. Abby’s identical twin is Robin Pogrebin, a culture reporter for the New York Times.
One and the Same covers all spectrum’s of the twin relationship, I feel. Each interview she did for the book brought a new, and vastly different perspective on what it is to be a twin. I think as a parent of a twin, having not been a twin myself, this is priceless information. I will never fully understand what my children’s bond is like, but I feel that now I have a slight (very, very slight) idea. Abby discusses what it’s like for twins with an almost inseparable bond to the opposite end of the spectrum, ones who haven’t spoken in years.
One of her many interviews is with Ronde and Tiki Barber (if those names don’t sound familiar ask your husband and then get ready to hear some insane stats) who quite candidly admit that their “twinship” comes before their marriages. They even discuss how unsure they were of playing on different NFL teams.
Aside from interviews with other identical twins (including her twin sister Robin, which is some of the most raw reading you will ever do), Abby digs into the research and interviews many of the top experts in the twin field, including someone you may be familiar with, Joan Friedman. Topics range from fertility treatments to how one twin can have a life-threatening disease while the other is healthy. One and the Same also delves into twin loss and how the surviving twin copes, whether the loss happened at birth or later in life.
I cannot say enough good things about this book. Even if your multiples are not twins, you should read this book, that’s how great and informative it is…
"...Truly lent insight into the way in which twins themselves interact with the world"
-Kellie Asaro
Just wanted to drop you a line to let you know I finished your book. And, I loved it! I have been recommending it to all of the twin parents that I know. I felt that your book truly lent insight into the way in which twins themselves interact with the world. How they see each other. How the world is different and particular to their situation. It was intimate, informative, and simply fascinating to hear all of the different stories. You have touched on so many different facets. Things I had never even thought about, as a parent, quite honestly. And so, I feel like I have a bit more to draw from as my boys grow and change. They just turned 3 last October. Thank you so much for writing your book!
Warmest regards,
Kellie Asaro
"A page-turner chock-filled with information about twins "
-Pamela Weinberg, author of bestselling parent guide: "City Baby"
What is it like growing up as an identical twin, looking at someone else and feeling like you are looking into a mirror? Abigail Pogrebin drew on her own personal experience growing up with her identical twin, Robin, but she wanted to cast a wider net and explore available research as well as other people’s experiences. The result is One and the Same: My Life as an Identical Twin and What I’ve Learned About Everyone’s Struggle to Be Singular, a page turner chock-filled with information about twins from the scientific, to the psychological, to the emotional. Abigail interviewed numerous experts on twins and attended conferences around the world in her quest for information. The relationship between Abigail and Robin provides the backdrop for the book and is a moving and special love story between two sisters.
(Go to link for Q&A between Pamela and Abby)
"I devoured this book"
-Rochelle Cunningham
Link: The Logan and Jack Chronicles
For Christmas my mom bought me this book by Abigail Pogrebin.
I devoured this book!
Josh said he has never seen me read a book so slowly. This was only because I was reading and re-reading every chapter. The information was just mind blowing. She covers every aspect of twinship. Parenting, separation, individuality, loss, everything… If you are a twin, have twins or are just fascinated by twins, I suggest this read.
I finished it a few weeks ago, totally in love with it. Then, ironically, today I got an e-mail from the author. She happened upon my blog and asked that I share her book and website with you. I feel so honored. On her website she has started a “Dear Abby” section where you can ask her any questions about twins you may have. Check it out: www.abigailpogrebin.com
And pick up this book!
29th
The Lesley Stahl Interview
"Enchanting, fascinating....It's a wonderful book."
-Lesley Stahl
Lesley Stahl interview Abigail Pogrebin for Wowowow
"A great job of getting past the clichés of twinship and letting us see the real inner turmoil that can occur as twins each try to work out their journey to becoming a unique individual"
-Holly Scheuer
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